Am

Sometimes one gets amazed how many mixt emotions flow withing the self. And how paradoxic it is the fact that we try to defend being ourselves, but the case is that defining one self is one of the most blurred images one can draw! Finding myself that contradictory, the bottom line is that the thing that defines me is exactly my hability to change. This self portrait was written 2 years ago, and its still very accurate, but again, it might change in some future...


Am a coward who dares to say it
So strong to proclaim am weak
Good enough to realize my evil
Straight enough to unmask my sheets

Great enough to realize am nothing
Cool enough to lead myself by my soul heat
Sure enough to hold myself to no man
No man at all... and thats including me

Am as high as I can reach in this hole
As though as this soft man can be
Romantic, as my rough paths taught me,
And fighter as a creep one is...

So sane, to know that something is so wrong
So wrong, that i work hard to heal...
So sad that i strike back with good moods,
So happy with the blues i live

So slave that am emancipating,
And slaved myself to never bend my knees
So clear to know that am confused
And after such confusions, that is something clear...

Am coldhearted, with feet in solid grounds now,
With a warm heart, dreaming high and deep
With my life depending from just no one...
and am holding on on mighty God, and his deeds...

Anxious to become so patient
Patiently knowing i rush me
Calmly waiting for an answer,
Working hard to answer me...

Burying that dark past that haunted me,
Using such past to rebuild me,
Killing up my old memories and bad dreams,
Making a better man from such griefs...

Diffused enough to make from that a concept,
Am all and nothing, health and sick,
Hopeless and faithfull, poor and rich,and conflicted...
A special human, and average being...

Am traveling in the solar system,
In circles, in this giant ship,
I know the future, but dont know my own fate
Guess this is what am calling 'live'...